Many at times as mums, we tend to put our dreams on hold once we start having children, It’s not always something we do unconsciously.Children are a great gift and a wonderful addition to our homes and lives, but at the same time we must confess that caring for them requires a lot of hard work. It’s perfectly understandable that some mums might find themselves putting their dreams on hold, with the excuse that they can always get back to things at a later time. The problem is that often times that time never comes.
Even if a woman’s dream is to have children, there exist deep inside of her a dream waiting to materialise. Maybe you want to publish a book. Maybe you have been thinking about starting your own business, selling a product or acquiring a skill. Whatever it is, if you think about it daily, wondering if you can actualise it while you are raising your kids, especially when they are still babies, then this is the best time to make it a reality.
I’m not claiming that it will be easy. It’s won’t be. But the fact that it wont be a walk in the park doesn’t mean that you can’t find fulfillment while doing it.
Yes, there may be some sleepless nights and yes, you must learn to ask for help at some point. But in time, you will realise that pursuing your personal dreams makes you happier, more fulfilled and even a better mother.
Here are few tips to guide you as you strive to actualize your dreams even while raising children
Get a mentor or adviser:
If you want to raise your kids and pursue your passions, you will need a mentor, adviser or just someone who truly believes in you and your dreams. Trust me, this is very key if you must actualise your dreams. If your dream is to become a fashion designer for instance, you must look out for successful fashion designers, read about their success stories, look out for them on social media, study them and reach out to them if possible. Some established persons take on mentees, look around and reach out to them.
Get a support system:
One of the fastest ways you can achieve your dreams is having a support system behind you who push you, support you and give you the wings to fly. Often times, most mums think that their support system has to be a family member or friend, but were they wrong! Your support can be just about anyone. For example, your child’s teacher who keeps you updated with your child’s education/progress or even your boss who is understanding enough to give you a day off when you need to cater to your child’s ill health is your support system. Above all, an emotional support system is bae and you can find it in your spouse, partner, family or friends.
Have a clear picture of what your real dreams are.
Before you spend your precious time pursuing anything, make sure it’s what you really want to do with your life. A popular saying goes, “if you do what you love, you may never have to work for anyone again in your life. Don’t follow the bandwagon, have a clear-cut picture of what your dreams truly are and work towards it. A great way to determine this is to really find out what you really love and don’t mind doing for free for the rest of your life.
Create time to spend quality time all by yourself.
If you are never alone, you won’t get much done. So, each day, carve out time daily where you can focus on what you are trying to accomplish. A great time to do this is when the kids are asleep or in school. Make the best use of such rare moments.
Organize your home and life:
If your home is a mess (which is pretty common if are nursing or have a handful of toddlers), it can be hard to think and get things done. But, do try to enlist some help to get your home organized. This also means organising the space that you will be working from. You also need to get help especially with tending to the children so you can at least have some time to cater to yourself.
Realise that you don’t have to achieve your dreams all at once:
You must realise that you don’t have to achieve your dreams all at once. So for instance, if you desire to own a digital media agency in the near future, you don’t necessarily start out by owning an office (outside your home). You can start out by beginning online (go digital). So many amazing mums like you are running successful businesses online. You will be amazed at how much they are racking. i digress. So start online first, when it is time to get an office or expand, you will know. The key is to start small and grow big.
Create a plan:
Every great business begins with a plan. You must understand that you cant make any headway if you don’t draw up a plan, stick to it and make adjustments along the way. The first thing is to draw up a plan, write it down and place it in a strategic spot where you will see it and be reminded about it every single day. A great spot is your bedroom mirror. You have to be resilient and be determined to succeed and realise your dreams. This is why you need not surround yourself with dream killers but people who believe in your dreams and can provide you the much needed push you need.
Always remember to keep your family first
As much as it is important to pursue your dreams as a mum, its also important for you to carry your family along even in your pursuit of greatness. With a good schedule, diligence, planning and focus you can still be a great mum to your children, a great wife to your spouse, while pushing your dreams.
Connect with other moms in the same boat.
Studies have shown that the best sources of support and encouragement any mother can get is from fellow moms who are in the same boat as she is. Try to find other moms who are entrepreneurs or pursuing some other personal goal, and form relationships with them. There is nothing like the support you get from people who truly understand the challenges that come with managing your family while pursuing a dream.
Are you currently facing this challenge or have overcome it, please share your experiences with us below or email [email protected]