Unlike some of his peers in Nollywood, actor Ramsey Nouah has been married for 15 years and has managed to keep his marriage and wife far away from the prying eyes of the public. Ramsey and Emelia Philips-Nouah, tied the knot in 2002 and their marriage is blessed with three children.
In a recent interview with Premium Times, Nouah, had this to share:
Ramsey, your marriage appears to have stood the test of time. You have been married for 15 years now. Some of your colleagues have been unlucky in this regard.
“Contrary to a widely held notion, the success of a marriage largely rests on the woman. But these days, a lot of marriages are based on equality. A woman wants to get 50 per cent of whatever she is giving into the marriage back from the man. This has led to the breakdown of many marriages.
From time our mothers used to be the women that held their marriages. They were in charge of the home. Our mothers took charge of everything but today women don’t want that kind of responsibility. Hence, it is affecting marriages.
My wife belongs to the category of “our mothers”. She believes in sustaining our marriage and holding it strong. So whenever I am asked how we have been able to keep it together, I tell them my wife is the woman who has actually held our home.”
Do you also accord her rightful place in the home?
“She doesn’t have a place because she owns the home. It’s her call however way she wants things done. She is the driver of the family and her decision is final. That is why I say she is not an ordinary woman. She is a triple woman.”
So, you guys have had it smooth sailing in your marriage all the while?
“Don’t get me wrong, don’t think that we don’t have our moments of disagreement. But it depends on the way we handle it. Women cannot stand the heat in the kitchen anymore and they just want to run.
That is why marriages are crumbling. A lot people don’t want to work hard anymore, because marriage is hard work. So when you talk about marriages crashing, it’s not my call. The only problem that I have is to make sure I provide food for the family.”
Any counsel for your colleagues who have been unlucky with love and marriage?
” Nobody gives advice when it comes to matters of the heart. People say they are going for counseling and all but at the end, it is what is in their heart is still what they want to do. Because those things in your heart are laced with emotions and emotions are very hard to tackle. When you have emotion that is full of jealousy, hate or anger, it is hard to break it until you exercise it. Most times, you learn by experience.
Companionship is not easy. When everybody is running into marriages as if marriage wants to go out of fashion, take your time and be ready for it. Be ready to accept someone with his flaws. My wife has her problems and I also have mine. A lot of it actually and I know. You must be able to accommodate the other person.”
Divorce is on the rise. Why do you think this is so?
“When a woman believes she earns more than the man, the man should start doing the work of a woman like sweeping, changing diapers. There is no sense in that.
A woman’s place should not change and the same applies to the man. I am not expecting a woman to overwork herself with house chores. I help and support my wife when there is no help in the house. I sweep when I have the time.”
Many people wonder why you do not step out with your wife on the red carpet?
“My wife and I have an understanding. And this is one of the reasons our marriage is still standing strong. We avoid the public eye because the public has a way of messing up relationships. Sometimes, my wife goes ahead of me into the event, so we don’t do red carpet.
It is the same people that harass you for not taking your wife to red carpet event that will sit back and point fingers at how you both look.”
Some say you don’t take your wife to red carpet event because she is not beautiful?
“That is what they think. My wife is very cute. May be because my wife is not loud or flashy when it comes to make-up or wearing long weaves. She is very natural and she knows that I love her natural”